I’m not upset that you lied to me, I’m upset that from now on I can’t believe you.
Recently, I was asked to defined what an ideal relationship is. Confused by the question, I decided to follow the most adventurous part.
The 3 ladies who questioned me had suffered from at least 3 different bad relationship. But they were very determined and desperate to know what men truly wants in a relationship.
Their question and attitude were quite strange. They were very careful to lie about who they were, what they have passed through, in order to understand how to make relationship work.
I tried to make sense of what they were asking and put forward the following explanation:
1. An ideal relationship is not devoid of arguments,because a relationship with no argument is a relationship with lots of secrets.
2. An ideal relationship is the one where truth and forgiveness is highly appreciated.
3. An ideal relationship is the one which is build on love, nurture with love and sustained by love.
4. An ideal relationship is the one where both partners can see beyond each other’s fault and tried to understand and appreciate their differences.
“is there anything wrong?” I asked unconsciously,When it seems they were no longer following my explanation.
“Yes” one of them quickly pointed out.
“Why did most relationship that were so promising just end abruptly”
As I tried to provide the answer, I remembered this quote by Cassandra Clare:
“Lies and secrets, Tessa, they are like a cancer in the soul. They eat away what is good and leave only destruction behind”
Most relationship fail because of the two biggest enemies of relationship: lies and secrets. Once you lie, you will try and do all you can to cover up the lies, but no matter what you do, the lies will still hunt you down one day.
The same goes with secrets, it’s better to tell him or her the bitter secrets of your past relationship or anything that can destroy your happiness and or your relationship.